Relationship: Notes on Love, Mutual Respect, Boundaries, Marriage, and Divorce
by A. William Benitez
When I decided to write this book on relationship, my wife Barbara was surprised and cautioned me by saying that she would not dare write such a book because it was such a varied topic with so many nuances. That scared me because she is certainly more qualified to write about relationship than I am. I hesitated for a while but then I jumped in.
I have written about relationship before but was not satisfied with the results but now, for some unknown reason, I felt ready to tackle this huge topic and feel good about this book. I don’t see myself as an expert on relationship but I definitely have a lot to share that may be helpful to others.
The book contains ten chapters including What is Love, What is A Good Relationship, Fostering and Nurturing Relationships, Harming Relationships, Mutual Respect, Boundaries, Marriage, Breakups and Divorce, Helpful Tips, Final Thoughts, plus a Preface and an Introduction.
Being in a happy, healthy, intimate relationship is only possible if you relate to yourself in a happy and healthy way. How can you possibly relate comfortably with others if you’re not at peace with yourself. Are you comfortable with your everyday life or just trying to project an image you believe others expect of you? If you know yourself, and are comfortable with this knowledge, then chances are you are a good householder even if you’ve never heard the term before.
The term good householder seems to relate to someone who cares for a house or home but that’s only a small part of its meaning. I first heard the term used years ago while attending some spiritual classes, and it immediately peaked my interest. The actual meaning relates to fully taking on the responsibilities of daily life without dependence on others, and that has stuck with me all my life. It is the basis for an excellent question to ask yourself when making important life decisions. “Are my actions now those of a good householder?” Taking the few moments to ask yourself this questions and answer it honestly could make a significant difference in your life.
What is the full meaning of good householder? From my readings on the term, and my own feelings, there is a clear and simple definition. A good householder is a person who is complete, secure, and able to take care of himself. He is not dependent on any other person for his personal, day-to-day survival, and that includes a partner in an intimate relationship. Don’t let the definition confuse you into believing you can’t be part of interdependence within a healthy relationship. Nor does it necessarily mean that you want to be alone. It does mean that you can get along fine alone if necessary or if that’s the path you choose.
AUTHOR Bio and Links:
I spent most of my adult life self-employed after being born into the construction business. I worked with my father and then spent more than ten years as a general contractor, building homes and commercial buildings in Tampa, Florida.
For more than twelve years, I worked as a government official running housing related programs for the City of Tampa and then operated a publishing and consulting business on housing rehabilitation. During this time, I testified on this subject before the Housing Sub Committee of the U.S. Congress.
For several years, I operated an active woodworking business in Tampa, Florida and then in Austin, Texas. My cabinets, furniture, and carvings can be found in private homes, businesses, churches, and public buildings in both cities.
In 1996, I began working for the Hyatt Regency in Austin, Texas and am now the IT Manager.
In 2007 I established a new writing and publishing business called Positive Imaging, LLC and now write and publish how to books.
My first marriage ended after 17 years and I remained single for 14 years before marrying Barbara. We have been married over twenty-three years and share a happy and healthy relationship. We now live in Austin, Texas.
I learned a great deal from my first marriage and other relationships. However, my years with Barbara have been my most valuable learning and growing experience and definitely the happiest years of my life.
All the information in this book is based on my first-hand experiences, a small amount of research, and discussions with other couples. I sincerely hope that you will find it of real value in your own relationships. If you have any questions or comments, please contact me at:
The author will be awarding a $50 Amazon GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour.